In this last quarter of 2007 (a year that I believe God is pruning and perfecting some things in His people), God is setting me free from some things that have held me in bondage for too long.
- A Controlling Nature
- Being mastered by my emotions
These three things have troubled me so…particularly this year as God has stretched me and my spirit has undergone a serious makeover. A spirit of Fear is something that I believe has wrecked shop in the body of Christ. It has been something that has chased me even as a little girl. I was thinking about it the other day and realized that Fear entered the world very early. Think about the Garden of Eden. After Adam and Eve sinned against God, they ran and hid because they were afraid. But I’m also realizing that just like in the case of the first couple, fear is deceptive. You will only be able to hide in it for so long before God calls you out. I thank God for calling me out in this season. For the first time, I’m ready to stand before God truly naked. God is exposing and purging things in me in order to prepare me for the great Kingdom work ahead. It’s uncomfortable and sometimes painful but I trust that he sees the end.
When it comes to my controlling nature, I know that it is a result of my own insecurity. It’s when you feel the most out of control, when you feel like you have no control over your own self, that you attempt to control the people and situations around you. Somehow the enemy will make you think that manipulating your environment will make you more secure in yourself. He is a liar, of course. It only makes you feel worse. God is truly moving in this area of my life. I’m getting the push back from my controlling ways and am slowly coming to the realization that God is truly sovereign. His ways are not my ways. I’m alot of things…but one thing I’m not is Him.
Emotions. Well, this where I get in the most trouble. I’ve never learned how to control my emotions. Anyone who knows me…knows that that I struggle with mastering my emotions. It’s so easy to become a slave to your emotions. To allow them to rule your life so that your every response is not necessarily rooted in what God wants for you life…but in your own feelings. I cannot say it enough…EMOTIONS ARE DECEPTIVE! We have them, yes. God gave them to us, yes. But he gave them to us a way to relieve ourselves, as an outlet. He did not desire for us to be ruled by them. I’ve often consulted how I felt about something before I consulted God on what he wanted. If I felt good about it, I moved on it. If I felt bad about it, I didn’t. If I was angry…I had to let it be known. If I was sad…I actually preferred depression. My natural and spiritual intelligence almost always took a back seat to how I felt. But you see, emotions taint a situation. Satan uses emotions to distort and pervert how you see something; he extends the purpose of emotions beyond Godly release and into a driver for action. Satan does this to keep you unaligned. Your flesh is activated by your emotions so therefore he doesn’t want you to see and respond to things through your spiritual eyes but through your flesh. This is where he can oppress you and keep you on an emotional rollercoaster …which ultimately will keep you as far away from peace as possible.
But God is so awesome. I’m getting free this year, y’all. It’s time for the real Tracey (not a new one but the one God originally designed and purpose) to arise and truly walk worthy of His calling on my life. I see Him making room for me already…and I’m standing still and marveling at His works. I’m ready to give Him my all!!!
Wanna join me?